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Now, I am what you call a movie fan…maybe even a fanatic…I love watching movies…and that’s an understatement.

Books, books make me happy, I use to be a leadership reading/biography loving reader, however I decided awhile ago that fiction is where I should be stickin my face…stories in books get the creativity juices flowin, make me think, imagine, delve into another life on my own…

It’s strange though, call me sadistic, but I’m not a big happy ending loving kinda guy. My favorite movies and books are when they end on a not so happy note. When life doesn’t end perfectly, when the good guy loses, when life seems more like…well life.

Just to give you an idea of what I mean…(spoiler alerts ps)

Fight Club ends with Edward Norton shooting himself in the face when he finds out Brad Pitt is a figment of his imagination as he watches all these bank headquarters blow up…

Babel ends with Brad Pitt carrying his half dead wife to a helicopter because of the depravity of mans character, a Japanese deaf girl rejected and alone naked to be comforted by her father, a middle eastern father having his son shot and being charged for shooting a tourist by accident, and a Mexican illegal losing her son and possibly being deported because she went to a wedding…

My all time favorite book by George Orwell 1984 is the story of a gentleman named Winston fighting the “man” Big Brother, which in the end, when you think he’s fought the power, takes his index finger and writes in the dust on a table “I love big brother.”

I like these movies/books because they’re believable, in the sense that, well, that’s life…life is hard, it’s tough, it’s a grind. These movies/books are good because they’re real.

The funny thing though is that I always want life to be the movies that Disney makes…where life all works out in the end. I’m the happy princess waiting to be rescued by the prince, he fights a dragon to save me from the wicked witch, kisses me and….drum roll, we live happily ever after….what wait…ummm, well you get the idea.

I want my life to be the happy ending! But, life experience teaches me, I’m not the princess, I’m Edward Norton shooting myself in the face…

I won’t wake up from this dream, cause it’s not a dream it’s life, my reality…

The truth of it is, and this may sound crazy, I would take the gun to the face 9 times out of 10 over the prince….man I should really stop being the chick in this metaphor.

I would rather go through hard things, because, even though I’m a moron and I mess up more times then I get it right, it has made me into who I am. Would I prefer to not mess up, would I prefer to get things right all the time, yes, but if I did/didn’t I’d be Ben Stein, talking in a monotone voice trying to teach Ferris Bueller.

I will, love, work, laugh, play, and do life harder and better each day, taking all the bad endings along the way. Apologize more, cry harder, feel bad, and learn from my mistakes. Cause in the end, I am Edward Norton, with a hole in my face, and Brad Pitt is gone…and what’s life with out a few scars.

For those in internet land that don’t know, my wife and myself have moved up to Port Hardy for the summer…where is that you may ask yet again, well here…click HERE and you will see.

Port Hardy is in fact a small town.  In actuality it has less than 5000 people.  It has 2 grocery stores (a chain one and a local home grown one), it has 3 hardware stores, 3 gas stations, 2 ‘good’ clothing stores, 1 great kayak shop, and no stop lights.  That’s right, every intersection is a four way stop, why you may ask…no it’s not because there isn’t electricity up here, but because it’s just not busy enough to merit a green, yellow, red light stop sign.

My beautiful wife yesterday made a comment, “People always knock Port Hardy cause it’s a small town, but they’ve never been here.” I thought about it, and it’s true.  I knocked Port Hardy just because I had been here, and it bugged Naomi.  However, I’m not gonna lie, I do really like it up here.  People think different up here.  My father-in-law literally knows everyone in town.  It’s nice seeing familiar faces, and for the most part everyone is more friendly, more relaxed, enjoy themselves just a bit more up here. It has breathtaking scenery up here, my job is as chill as it gets, I meet people from all around who are up here just to escape as well.

I grew up in a small town, where a summer day’s thought process was not which movie should I see, or which video game to play, but rather, should I fish, swim, go canoing, or build a sandcastle today…maybe I’ll do them all!

I always use to laugh because when I was pastoring in Ladner, we’d always find it difficult to plan out door activities because everything is suburban hell.  Small parks, no room, cars everywhere, really it was no fun and or dangerous to do some youth events.  If we wanted to be in the great outdoors we’d have to drive to Chilliwack, or Squamish and that ain’t right. Planning to do something would consist of what movie to watch (anti-social) or where should we eat (fat).  Our city society is forcing us to be stupid, fat, ignorant, intolerant, self centered, all to ourselves people.

More and more people are moving into cities, closer to amenities, closer to “culture” closer to being further apart.  In a small town you know people because you hang out with people, in a city you’re lucky if you know your neighbor (guilty here!).  Today we are in closer proximity to people than ever before, but our proximity in relationship with them is further and further apart.

Kids in the city more and more play less and less outside because they have to drive a half hour to get to park where it is “safe.”  In a small town you go hiking in the bush as a four year old you’re gone for a week come back with a bear skin for a coat and you’re parents didn’t even know you were missing or just assumed you were alright.  It’s natural, raw, down to earth, the way life is supposed to be lived.

There is synergy in living in small community.  There is something more and more off about city living. No I’m not thinking about permanently moving up here, I like where I live, but what am I going to do.  I will make the effort to be small town minded, for God’s sake I’m just a small town boy, livin in a lonely world I took the midnight train goin anywhere…oh wait…damn you Journey damn you!  I’m going to make the effort to be small town minded, be more relaxed, spend more time with people I love being around and people I don’t even know yet, I’m gonna make time to get outside, not because I should because I have to!

Just on an aside…I don’t think mega churches are the way to go either…just a thought…(I know this is a whole other bag…)but really…it doesn’t make sense…really…think about…no really…do it!

I say don’t knock a small town because the people that come from small towns are nicer, more well rounded, smarter (in life and education), and better looking (naturally), than any city folk. Yes just like any town there are some crazies…but where would we be with out the crazies…

So take some time to go out in the forest and kill your own bear and bring back a coat, metaphorically speaking…well sorta…

On a final aside some where asking about my last post if we took the job…the answer was NO we decided not to go further in the process…good experience though…

So for those that don’t know Naomi and I have moved up to Port Hardy for the summer. Naomi will be working with a girl with Down Syndrome whom she has worked with for the past few years. For myself, I will be working with a senior citizen, also know as Pops, also known as my father in law at his wonderful kayak shop (ps someone you know designed his logo…).

If you’ve never been to Port Hardy, which I’ll bet 99% of you haven’t it is a long way to get here.  Let me break it down for you.  We live in Abbotsford and that is 1 hr to the ferry terminal give or take.  Then it is a 2 hr ferry ride from Tsawwassen to Nanaimo.  From Nanaimo you have to drive an approximate 5 hrs (3hrs my driving) up to Port Hardy.  So altogether, lets do the math, 1+2+3/5=6-8 hrs of travel time. You all should come and visit! On a side note, my father in law informed me that before the highway got put into Port Hardy to Campbell river, you either had to drive 6-7 hrs on a logging road to get down island or take an 8 hr ferry ride from Port Hardy to Campbell…good times…

Back to the whole point of this entry.  I like driving, in fact I drive many days just to get out of the house because I like it so much.  I’ll drive 20km just to get a good slurpee.  So when we came up to the island we had an interview with a church on the island for a youth pastors position, and it went well but we had big decision to make, to pursue the job further or let it go.  So leaving the meeting with the drive,  Naomi and I had a good conversation about it, and we decided that we would take the week to just think and pray about it, and we did.

The day after we got here, I found a motorbike in Campbell river, about 2 hrs from Port Hardy, and I suggested to Naomi (she actually thought the same) that I drive down alone to pick up the bike so I could pray, think, drive and just be alone, and I did.

I realized in that drive, that the reason I like to drive is because God likes to drive.  Or to put it another way, that’s when God gets me distraction free, when I’m in the car by myself, and he doesn’t get a lot of alone time with me (sadly true).

So, as I drove, I thought. I had no music in my father in laws truck so I sang alone, well, not really I sang every worship song I could think of, so I guess God was listening, that was kinda the point.  I wasn’t so much doing cause I wanted to worship, more to annoy God with my bad singing! By annoying him I should elicit some response or so was my thinking…it works for Naomi and my little sister.

Anyways no booming voice from heaven only what I was already feeling, which I’ve realized is how God speaks to me, through what my passion is, what it has already been, and what I want it to be.  If things don’t match up with that then I can almost guarantee I won’t do it.

I’ve realized that scripture talks about a loving caring passionate God, and he places things on our hearts to move us forward not only in our life but in the lives of others, and ultimately in our life with him. 99% of the time I know what I want it’s because it’s what God has already placed on my heart, the praying, confusion, deliberation etc comes because I doubt, I’m scared, and well flat out not sure, even though I’m sure.

I’m taking steps to follow my instinct, my gut, my intuition, my sixth sense (no dead people yet), whatever you want to call it, because I know that that thing inside me that says yes or no is the Holy Spirit, God, Jesus’ passion in me that he placed…leading me to new adventures, new places and new roads of life.

I like driving because God likes driving.  Jesus take the wheel, not so much that’s stupid, but Jesus speak to me while I drive cause I have physical hands and you don’t…that sounds good to me.

Today I hopped on my new bike and drove to Port Alice, because I like driving and so does God…alone on the road, I feel close to him, close to what he wants, close to where I’m supposed to be…I’ll get there sooner or later, but for now, I’ll just drive.

I’ll leave you with the immortal words of a genius in his own right

So Naomi and I had the great privilege to be at YC Alberta this year, to do some fun work recording some great speakers and just hanging out with 16,000 crazy kids from all over BC, Alberta, and Saskatchewan! It’s a giant Christian music festival where all the biggest names in faces and bands are out to put on a really good time!

In our down time, we had a fun time shooting some great bands that were there during the weekend, it’s always fun to meet new people, got to meet the great guys from Bluetree, Relient K, David Crowder, Thousand Foot Krutch, Manafest and Parachute Band…here are a few pics from our busy weekend where I thank God I had ear plugs cause I’d be walking around with a hearing aid by the first night…check it out…

PS learned a life lesson, driving home 9hrs during the night…keeping awake is key…however doing that by mixing an energy drink, pepperoni sticks, apple fritter, and a soda makes for many stops where you relive the food a way you would rather not…oh the joy of road trips!